When I first joined VA as a staff psychologist, I met a mentor who would come to shape my understanding of LGBTQ+ military service. Debby, a Navy Veteran and the original LGBTQ Veteran Care Coordinator (VCC) at our hospital, was preparing for retirement. She gifted me her collection of LGBTQ+ books, including rare copies of Ann Bannon’s series and Alison Bechdel’s works. These texts were windows into the experiences of previous generations who had to navigate their identities in a world that often forced them to hide.
Debby, who served before the days of “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” (DADT), shared stories of being a closeted lesbian in the military—experiences both heartwarming and terrifying. She described a coded song that women used to “come out” to one another in secret. But she was also investigated twice for suspected queerness, always under the looming threat of career-ending consequences if discovered.
For LGBTQ+ military service members, the repeal of DADT in 2011 was a critical turning point. DADT, intended as a compromise, resulted in the discharge of over 14,000 service members due to their sexual orientation. Its repeal, along with the subsequent policy allowing transgender individuals to serve openly, represented progress toward a more inclusive military, though challenges remain. National Coming Out Day reminds us of the courage it takes to live authentically and highlights the ongoing fight for equality.
The mental health impact of “coming out”
For LGBTQ+ Veterans and service members, coming out isn’t just a personal journey—it can be a matter of health and well-being. Research shows that LGBTQ+ individuals, particularly transgender Veterans, face disproportionate mental health challenges. Transgender Veterans are 20 times more likely to attempt or die by suicide compared to their cisgender peers. These outcomes aren’t a reflection of identity but of the stigma, discrimination and violence that LGBTQ+ people endure.
Poor mental health among LGBTQ+ populations is often driven by external factors—hostility and exclusion from others—rather than any inherent vulnerability. Studies consistently show that acceptance, whether within the family, workplace or health care settings, leads to significantly improved mental health outcomes for LGBTQ+ people. This is why National Coming Out Day, and the broader culture of acceptance it promotes, is so crucial. For Veterans and service members, VA must be a safe place where the LGBTQ+ population can be open about their identities without fear of judgment or rejection.
LGBTQ+ Veterans and VA
As the LGBTQ+ Veteran Care Coordinator since 2022, it has been my role to ensure that all Veterans receive the care they deserve while also affirming their identities. VA is for all Veterans, and it’s critical that we address the unique needs of those who belong to minority groups, including LGBTQ+ Veterans. Our work with the CMV further highlights the intersection of identities—Veterans of color and LGBTQ+ Veterans who often face compounded challenges due to discrimination across multiple dimensions.
In recent years, VA has expanded its services to support LGBTQ+ Veterans, with dedicated care coordinators in every facility. Yet, we know there’s more to be done. At present, Black transgender women are among the most vulnerable populations in the U.S., facing high rates of violence and discrimination. Advocacy and policy changes are necessary to ensure safety and access to services for all Veterans, with attunement to their gender identity and sexual orientation.
The road ahead
National Coming Out Day is a powerful reminder of the importance of visibility and authenticity. For Veterans and service members who have fought for the freedom of others, the ability to live openly should not be a privilege, but a right. As VA continues to work toward more inclusive care, we must ensure that all Veterans—no matter their sexual orientation or gender identity—know that they are seen, valued and supported.
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Unsubscribing from this BS.
I served before and after DADT was implemented. Although I made it to retirement, the stress of being outed was detrimental to my health. I am in awe of the openness that’s possible for today’s servicemembers and I am please that so many people who were discharged are getting upgraded. I hope the commenters who worry about ogling will think about the many times that happens in opposite sex situations and brings unwelcome attention to the other person. Also consider that LGBTQ+ people have more important things to worry about beside bringing unwelcome attention to themselves. Just one example: Adam R. Schindler, Jr.’s murder.
OK, so I will be the odd one out. Sure to gain the ire of everyone on all sides, but some things need to be addressed.
1) Are you not also worried about females checking out male arses? Probably more afraid of that exposure to not get Written Up or a Captain’s Mast. No doubt that you have showered with a number of Gay and Trans males, and outwardly appearing cis-males struggling with identity of oneself I fit the latter). Did you ever once fill threatened? And guess what, same as with females doing inappropriate things with males, the Military has a Instructions on how to properly handle those situations. Confront or report; that is your choice. No matter the sexual preferences/gender identities we have, are we all not Brothers and Sisters in Arms? Are we not in the Fight together as Patriots? I would be far more concerned about those who have been serving who are not really Patriots (numerous islamic theology attacks by Service Members), than who thinks who looks cute in a towel.
2) Yes, human beings are God’s Design. So to are the animals and plants. In fact, 100% of the entire Universe is God’s Design; the Original Design. We are nothing more than mere copies of that Original Design. Make a copy of a copy that is of a copy and the result is a degraded copy. The sickness, maladies, and infirmities that befall us today, simply did not exist with Adam and Eve, nor the Dawn of Humanity outside of the Garden of Eden. So did God create all of this calamity that h as beset Humanity? No. The Universe was Created but it runs on its own devices. Much like writing code for a program. Does it not work on its own, without the need of the original programmer there to direct what bits go to which bits? Not at all. So to does the program that runs the Universe does so autonomously. No one selected you to be born male of female. Some genetics, possibly some environmental parameters were involved in that decision, but it is really the luck of the draw how you came out. Remember, we are all unisex zygotes till a certain trigger floods the embryo to cause to develop the gonads and brain function, one way or another and to what extent. Is a person born with gonad traits of the opposite sex or of both living contrary to God’s Plan? What would you do? Go all Spartan and toss the infant/child off the cliff?
So yep, you guessed it. I am Christian and I am a Transgender woman. I silently struggled with my identity since my earliest memories as a toddler. I am old enough to not have ever heard Trans (anything). Nobody turned me into this and I ain’t doing it because I am bored. So I made the decision to dig deep and find myself. And as a Christian, I conversed with Jesus about this. And guess what, He still has that Open Door wide open for me. I don’t blame God Almighty for how I was born and Jesus accepts me fine, as Believer in Christ. You know, that you can easily talk to someone thru an open door. So why don’t ya just give it a try. Talk to Jesus directly. No need for a chvrch intercessor. Or do you not Believe Jesus’ own Words in the Bible? Pretty straightforward. Who do you think taught The Duke how to shoot straight and from the hip?
My “coming out” happened in a letter to Secretary of Defense Richard Cheney complaining about harrassment by my superior officer in front of my subordinates inside the real Top Gun squadron, Fighter Squadron One (VF-1). This happened as I had overall 4.0 evals and had served ten months and two weeks of a 4-year enlistment. The letter was intercepted, I was confronted, I stood by the letter, and within days I was honorably discharged with RE4 (Not Recommended for Reenlistment). Three years later Congress declared this Unconstitutional. Nobody told me. Meanwhile, I had kept a diary. That became a book. That book is now at the US Naval War College, US Naval Academy, Harvard, and Yale.
This is not part of minority affairs! Even by normal prejudicial standards!
What the f-ck is this…???
As a male Veteran, the last thing any of us needed was to have to be concerned if some guy was checking out our asses while in the showers and moving from the shower area to our birthing compartments and while in our birthing compartments as we all walked around in various stages of undress…!!!
We had enough to worry about in our daily routines aboard ship without having to be exposed to this…!!!
This administration has destroyed our military…!!!
This had no place in our military and was never allowed for reasons just like I mentioned above and it still has no business in our military…!!!
If these people want to serve in the military then they need to be put in positions where they cannot be where anyone might be made to feel uncomfortable such as any situation where members might be dressing/undressing, showering, in the head, or in the birthing compartments.
It is not fair to our members that do not agree with their lifestyle and their sexual orientation…!!!
If this type of behavior is going to be allowed then it needs to be done it needs to be fully explained to every potential recruit prior to enlisting so they can make an informed choice to join up or not…!
For those who are already enlisted, they need to be given a choice to either stay in or be honorably discharged immediately.
Individuals trying to live a life contrary to God’s design will struggle in many ways…emotionally, mentally, spiritually and physically.
Affirming and celebrating their rejection of Gods design for them, only continues to harm them.
Counseling and speaking God’s truth to them will help bring them to peace in God’s design for them.
Thank you for sharing your experience and shedding light on this important topic! Amazing article.
Beautifully written, Dr. Guedj! Thank you for all the work you do to support our veterans!
Why has my name been taken off for comments?
I wrote a thoughtful comment that immediately disappeared.
Amazing article!