Helping Veterans manage holiday stress

They come every year whether we’re ready or not… the holidays. The holiday season is marketed as “the most wonderful time of the year,” but it can also be one of the most stressful times of the year. Purchasing gifts, preparing special recipes, decorating inside and out, and attending large family or social gatherings can be expensive, exhausting, hectic and overwhelming.

While there are many environmental and life factors that can increase stress, this time of year can highlight mental health concerns, like depression and anxiety, as it can be a time of self-reflection, loneliness and sadness. Specifically for Veterans, the holidays can enhance difficulties adjusting to civilian life, exacerbate posttraumatic stress disorder symptoms, put a focus on certain dates or anniversaries, and induce guilt.

However overwhelming this season can be, there are ways to focus on your mental health and keep your stress levels in check over the next few weeks.

Recognizing symptoms of depression and anxiety

The holidays are notorious schedule interrupters. If you have time off from work, you may stay up late and miss your usual workout. Parties usually offer a variety of food and drink you may not usually consume. Trying to squeeze in a multitude of obligations can leave you feeling worn out.

All of these things can make it difficult to take care of ourselves and increase the chance of ignoring our mental health.

Keep your stress levels in check

Here are some of the symptoms of depression:

• Fatigue
• Irritability
• Difficulty sleeping
• Headaches
• Excessive drinking
• Overeating

Here are some of the symptoms of anxiety:

• Feeling restless, wound up, or on edge
• Being easily fatigued
• Having difficulty concentrating
• Being irritable
• Having headaches, muscle aches, stomachaches or unexplained pains
• Difficulty controlling feelings of worry
• Difficulty falling or staying asleep

People cope with stressful situations in different ways and can often work through them. If you feel like you might be heading toward a crisis, VA or community-based services could help. Take a confidential, anonymous risk assessment to see if stress and depression might be affecting you.

Causes of holiday stress

Often, tension-inducing situations revolve around three things:

• Relationships: Misunderstandings or conflict can be an issue, and if you’re unable to be with your family and friends, you can feel lonely.
• Finances: It’s easy to get caught up in spending too much on gifts, travel, food and entertainment, especially when the holidays add pressure and unrealistic expectations.
• Physical demands: There’s no shortage of things to do… shopping, social gatherings, preparing meals and hosting house guests.

Coping and managing holiday stress

Perfectly cooked meals. Don’t compare yourself to others.

Here are some tips:

• Manage expectations: Learn to say “no.” You can’t be everything to everyone. Setting boundaries is normal and healthy.
• Look toward the future: The end of the year is naturally a time for reflection, but try to focus on the future, not the past.
• Do something for someone else: Serving others was likely one of the reasons you joined the military. You can continue to serve once you’re out. Look around your community. Chances are, volunteers are needed for a variety of good causes.
• Look for free activities to enjoy: Take your dog for a walk, play board games with friends, or join a book club.
• Understand perfection doesn’t exist: At this time of year, social media explodes with pictures of seemingly perfectly cooked meals, loving families and gifts that look like they took hours to wrap. Don’t compare yourself to others. The reality behind these images may be quite different from what you see on the screen.
• Set differences with others aside: Focus on forging healthy connections.
• Make a budget: There are usually increased financial demands this time of year. Plan to make a budget and stick to it.
• Plan ahead, make lists, schedule activities in advance: There’s only so much time in a day. Don’t pack too much into a short amount of time.
• Try to keep up healthy habits: Find ways to stay active and if you’re going to be drinking or around substances, consider decreasing use.
• Reach out for help if you’re starting to feel overwhelmed: No matter what you’re experiencing, we’re here to connect you with resources and support systems. Even if you’re not enrolled in VA health care or benefits, our resource locator can help you.
• Be flexible and give yourself a break when you need it: Sometimes plans change, presents don’t get delivered on time, or loved ones aren’t able to visit. Try to remain flexible and adapt when situations don’t fit your expectations. Give yourself time to make decisions, take a breather, or take some time away from others when you do need it. Remember that it’s ok to feel things as they happen. Learn from them and move forward.

You’re not alone

Please use this information to have a safe and healthy holiday season. If you need help this month or any time of the year, the Veterans Crisis Line is here for you 24 hours a day, 7 days a week and 365 days a year.

Contact the Veterans Crisis Line to receive confidential support. You don’t have to be enrolled in VA benefits or health care to connect. To reach responders, dial 988, then press 1, chat online at VeteransCrisisLine.net/Chat, or text 838255.